I have known for the past two years or so that my son had officially become a tween. Some of the first signs included a tendency to become “mouthy” and argumentative at times, as well as the need to faithfully apply deodorant each morning.  Of course, he possess all of the “tools” required of  male tweens and teens today-iPOD, XBox 360, cell phone (just acquired in the last six weeks) and a vocabulary that includes verbage from the rap culture. (What?) In just a few short weeks, my almost-twelve-year-old-tween has become a teen, even though the “magic 13” is over one year away.  Here are some of the clues that this morphism has occurred:

1. The bathroom of my son now includes products such as AXE shampoo and body wash (what happened to Johnson’s No More Tears?), Purpose Gentle Cleansing Face Wash, Clearasil Cleansing Pads and hair styling gel.

2. I have been informed by afore mentioned boy/man that the tags in his clothing must read Aeropostale, American Eagle and Under Armour. It is still okay to wear college and pro sports athletic shirts, so his Penn State and Pittsburgh Steelers apparel is safe-for now!

3. This past week it was necessary to replace his worn out Nike sneakers for a new pair.  Since the beginning of the school year, his once youth-sized feet have grown into a men’s size 8 1/2, along with a man-sized price of $50.00. Cha-ching!

4. My once always-pays-attention, never-forgets-books-or-papers child is forever forgetting to bring home the items necessary for homework completion.  In a flabbergasted moment, I asked, “What is going on with you?” His reply-“I am too busy talking!” This from a child once so shy that he spent his entire Kindergarten year (sans the last three weeks) standing by himself on the playground at recess. My sort of socially awkward child is now a social butterfly. Go figure!

5. Just this past week, Junior climbed in the car for a ride to the bus stop and informed me that if I got up close to him, I could REALLY smell his AXE bodyspray because he had doubled his usual amount. (I had to stifle my smile/giggle.) I am sure that some sort of expensive manly-man cologne is next……

These are just a few of the signs that times they are a-changin in our household, and there is no turning back now.  Junior’s once dormant hormones had been awakened and even Ambien won’t be able to lull them back to sleep.  Lord help me!

My son has been a vegetarian since birth. This somewhat unconventional diet has not been his choice, but rather was imposed upon him solely by birth right. He has never ingested a juicy burger from a fast food chain, nor has he been served bacon with his breakfast. At Thanksgiving, we show up strictly for the carbs-no turkey protein for us! Junior is comfortable and satisfied at mealtimes, where the staples include cheese, beans, tofu, yogurt and whole grains, including lots-o-pasta. Over the years, I have brainwashed informed him of the inhumane and often unsanitary conditions in which cattle and poultry are raised in the United States. We have also discussed that as a card-carrying member of the “Religion of Joan,” it is considered less than spiritual to eat animals.

I remain hopeful that nearly twelve years of education and abstinence from flesh-eating have guaranteed that my son will adhere to this diet, however, a certain curiosity with the forbidden fruit (or shall I say forbidden flank steak) has been brewing in Junior’s little veggie head. Recently, he expressed an interest in taste testing a real, all-beef burger. Is Junior’s new found inquisitiveness just that, or is it a form of teenage rebellion? If the latter is correct, I would much rather he rebel against his enforced diet than his Type 1 Diabetes. (I have been forewarned by his doctors and clinicians that adolescent diabetics often rebel against their condition as a means of  “fitting in.”) I must confess that my own curiosity has been peaked regarding Junior’s sudden interest in channeling his inner carnivore. I am just a teeny, weenie (pun intended) bit interested in learning if he likes it. (Kind of like Mikey in the LIFE cereal commercials.) He does, after all, possess the genes of a long line of butchers on his grandfathers side. Will his virgin patty-on-a-bun be passed through a window at the Golden Arches, or will it possess the title, “The Baconator,” where one can cross off two forms of livestock with just one bite? (Family and friends have discouraged him from choosing a burger-in-a-box as his first meat-inclusive meal, and are anxiously awaiting the call to assist him in his rite of passage.)

It has been several weeks since Junior first mentioned his interest in meat consumption. So far, he has remained faithful to the family food chain. I’ll keep you posted in the event he crosses over, and I’ll keep my fingers crossed that he remains my vegetarian baby!