Joan's Jottings


Online Dating-Week 6
February 13, 2011, 2:44 pm
Filed under: Online dating

Week six proved to be a quiet week with only six matches. ( I received no matches on Thursday.) The supply of available men appears to be dwindling. Shame on me for not finding “the one” in those first weeks when I was deluged daily with all of those great catches! (If you have been following along since January, you know that the term “great catch” did not apply to the vast majority of the first 200 men sent my way.)  Here is a brief synopsis of the other men deserving an Honorable Mention:

The first match of the week was a 51-year old man who had seven grandchildren. Seven grandchildren at 51???? (At age 50 1/2, I have one child who is in seventh grade.) Obviously, reproducing oneself begins early in that family. Grandpa, who is somewhat overweight, had an interesting photo of himself taken in Mexico. He is wearing a ball cap and a t-shirt with a skull imprinted on it, and he is coming out of the top of a birthday cake that says, “Eat Me” on the front. Not your typical sittin-in-the-rocking-chair kind of granddad. I’ll bet the grandkids really do “eat him up!”

My second match of the week had a well written profile, which included a nice quote under the section,”The Most Influential Person in my Life.” He listed his son, and said, “I am supposed to keep him grounded, but lately, he is the one keeping me grounded.”  Sweet! I really dig a guy that can write, but this one was not a match in an aesthetic sense. Darn!

My last match of the week is the winner in two categories. Under “Five Things I Can’t Live Without,” last on his list was “physical stimulation.” I am no Einstein, but even I know that this is merely a more clinical way of saying, “sex.” (He could also have said, “intercourse”-also very “clinical.”)  Nice try, Mr. Viagra! His primary profile photo is also the winner in the Kodak category. He is dressed in a business suit holding a leather portfolio tucked under his left arm while his right hand holds a pen that he is pointing towards the camera. His facial expression is more of a smirk than a smile. He looks like an ambulance-chasing attorney or cheesy used car salesman, or given his Jewish religious status, he could be another Bernie Madoff ready to offer you his latest Ponzi Scheme. He went into the “double delete” file.

That’s all she wrote, or to say it another way, I am out of material. With only six matches, there just isn’t much to work with, but, as you can see, there always is SOMETHING! Happy Valentine’s Day. Maybe next year, a dozen roses will arrive at my door- a gift from my match! A girl can always dream………


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